Motivational Mondays: G-Check With Mocha Kittz (Long Read)

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You can’t use up creativity. The more you use, the more you have. —Maya Angelou

“As You Know, I Absolutely Love The Late Great Poet & Inspirational Icon Maya Angelou. I Can Remember When I Was In High School And I Used To Do Lame Things Like Listen To The AM Frequency And Pick Up Some Of The Jazz & Classical Stations. I Used To Sit Back And Create Collages Lined With Poems, Corky Diary Submission, And Reflect About What She Meant In “I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings”. I Always Imagined A Beautiful Bird With Colorful Wings, And A Compelling Stare That Gazed Back At The On Looker. I Always Saw Myself As The Caged Bird… Until Later In Life I Learned.. How “It” Finally Became Free. “– @MochaKittzSays

I Picked The Quote Above For Motivational Monday To Share With You Beautiful People Of Why I Decided To Initially Start This Sort Of Space Where The Corky, Artsy, Sort Of “Outcast”, Kind Of People Could Come Together And Share Creative Juices. I Learned At A Early Age That How You Treat People; Really Does Count In The Long-Run. I’ve Been Asked To Explain This Numerous Times; (Especially Now That My Brands Are Becoming More Recognized! Ya’ll Lurk Too Much.. THANK YOU SO MUCH Though) As To When I Started Promotional Model & Brand Ambassador Work. A Few Lovely People Of #InspireNation Was Able To Locate My Local Cover Of “Local Looks Magazine” And The Questions Flooded On #Askfm: MochaKittzSays…. So For Motivational Monday.. I Present To You My Story Of How I Came Back Swinging.. My Initial Promo Modeling & Brand Ambassador Story… Don’t Ask About These Hoes ‘No-MO’! LMAO ***EMBARRASSING PICS INSIDE***


I Initially Started Looking To Give Myself A Confidence Booster, Trying To Liberate Myself From The Stigma Of Being A Domestic Violence Survivor. I Never Wanted Anyone To Look At Me As A Victim, Still To This Day People Feel Like They Need To Tip-Toe Around The Subject. Maybe It’s On Television And Someone Wants To Laugh At A Joke.. Yeah, It’s Usually When Someone Knows I’m There– And Laughing Is Messed Up– So They Just Look At Me For Confirmation Of Feelings.. Why Is Domestic Violence A Joke? Snapchat Surely Learned It’s Lesson With That One.. US SURVIVORS ARE NOT A JOKE! I Personally, Still Live In A Slight Fear.. These Abusers A Mentally Disturbed… Chemically Imbalanced.. You Can Medicine It Up.. But It’s WHO THEY ARE TO THE CORE.. I Voice My Truths To Help, Never To Give Power To My Abuser. Although I’ve Never Officially Received An Apology; I Told Myself That I Was Worth My Life.. The Best Life Possible… Perusing My Passions While Maintaining A Little Part-Time Job To Keep Ends Flowing. I Wasn’t Rich But I Was Happy That My Child & I Were Able To Continue On.. The Scar On My Face Was Healing.. I’mWas Blessed…

If You Need To Seek Help Or Speak With Someone About Your Story (If Applicaple) You Can Contact: The National Domestic Violence Hotline CALL 24/7/365 1-800-799-7233 1-800-787-3224 (TTY for Deaf/hard of hearing)


I Was On Facebook And I Saw A Listing From A Extremely Early Promotional Modeling Group In The Local Area. I Sent Them A Message & The Owner Was A Seemingly Nice Woman Whom Was Excited About The Idea Of Me Being A Promotional Model For Her. She Stated That She Was Looking To Add More Models On Her Team That Had A “It Thing”. Even Then, My Style Stood Out.. I Was Wearing Tu-tu’s With Converse Sneakers, Lace & Pumps Galore, And My Graphic T-shirt Game Was Out Of This World.

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My Style Just Stands Out Effortlessly.. So I Was All For It.. I Thought I Was A Little Bigger Than The Chicks On Her Profile But.. Eh? Mind You, I Was Just Walking Into My Heavy Metal Stage In Life And Bring Me The Horizon Was My Favorite Go-To Playlist.. Lol I Spent (And Spend) A Lot Of Time In Hot Topic.. Anywho, She Asked Me To Send Over A Few Shots And A Couple Of Other Things… Excitedly, I Did As Requested.. Praying She Would Contact Me With The Next Event.. The Event Turned Out To Be A Little Meet & Greet At A Upscale Apartment Complex Lobby. It Was To Officially Introduce The New Members And We Would All Travel To Make An Appearance At A Venue.. I Believe To Be The Old V-Lounge That Has Since Closed Down..

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I Ended Up Clicking With 2 Chicks That Didn’t Even Last For Six Months Of Me Starting. One Was A Beautiful Short Slim-Thick, Lighter Toned Woman; With Tattoos & Hazel Eyes.. The Other Was A Equally As Beautiful Shorter Slim, Dark-Skinned Woman With Colorful Locks In Her Hair, A Body Full Of Tattoos, And Piercings. I Know My Energy Seems To Attract Darkness; But These Chicks Seemed Cool. When I Tell You, These Two Females Let Me Know The ‘Joosey’ Messy Backstory Of The Promotional Team & Modeling Shenanigans. Me, I’ve Always Been The Type Of Person To Trust A Person To A Fault. You Can’t Just Tell Me “Not To Like Someone” And I Just Follow Like A Little Lap-Dog..

I Was A Little Irritated At The Chattiness; I Was Just Really Trying To Have A Good Night! I Listened To The Complaints Until We Actually Arrived At The Venue. I Decided To Drive Since My Little Car Had A Sound System; And Apparently These Two Chicks Loved The T.I CD Already In The Player. Lol The Claims Of The Owner Being A User & Abuser To Her Models, Phony By Showing Favoritism To More “Polished” Models, And Things Of That Nature Were Always With Me.. Meaning Noted.. But You Have To Actually DO Something To Me Personally For ME To Not Fuck With You… (This Excludes Close Friends & Family Members.. Lmao We Goin’ Ride Out If You Hurt My Family.. Lol)

The Entire Night I Enjoyed Myself, Not Sure If The 2 Females Were Gravitated Towards Me Because I Drove Or Because They Already Knew Why I Was There And.. I.. Too.. Would Eventually Realize What They Were Referring To. I Tried TO Not Look “Cliquey” As I Moved Around The Room, Meeting People.. Dancing.. You Know With My Pretty Ass.. The Whole Night The Owner And The Two Chicks Didn’t Speak.. She Definitely Was Watching Me For A Reaction For Sure.. Long Story Short, They End Up Quitting.. No Surprise To Me And I’m Solo-Dolo As Usual.. Just Like I Came In This World.. In The Meantime, Making Appearances At MANY Venues.. Providing Raw Promotional Content.. Just Trying To Make The Brand Pop More. To Be A Promotional Company, The Tactics Were Very Tired! I’m Known To Hit The Grown Running, Especially On New-Projects. I Really Believe IT IS A BLESSING That Ideas Come To Me So Fast.. And In The Manner They Do.. I Didn’t Learn To Appreciate BeingAble TO Channel Until I Met My Good Friend Kaleb Rashad.. But You’ll Meet Him Later! Lol

I Was Looked Over By The Owner So Many Times Because I Didn’t Have The Right “Look” For The Part. I Was “Too Urban Looking”.. What The Hell Did That Exactly Mean Anyway?

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I Mean, I Did Recently Have A Baby.. But The Snatch Back Is CRUCIAL And My Butt Was Plump! She Always Stated The I Was “Plus Sized” Which I Already Knew…. But Wasn’t Expecting Her To Say It.. Given Her Size At The Time… When I Was 10-Years-Old, Living In New York City, I Was Approached By A Modeling Coach From Barbizon Modeling School Leaving A Chinese Restaurant With My Grandma. The Only Reason Why I Was “Plus-Sized” Was Because My Hips Were Curvy. They Wanted To Market Me As An Adult But My Parents Wasn’t Having It.. At That Moment, I Then Realized What The 2 Chicks Were Referring To. But Why Even Add Me To The Team? Why Even Make False Promises Of Photo Shoots If You Didn’t Really Like My Style? My Size Was Nicely Proportioned And Not TO Body Shame.. I Was WAAAAY Slimmer Than Her.. My Problem Was That I Was

“Wearing My Confidence”.. Didn’t Know It Then, But I Accepted The Lies Just Because I Had No Proof… But Colors Always Runs Off With Hot Water”– @MochaKittzSays

I Was On The Promotional Team For 1 1/2 Years Now.. I’ve Seen Many Models Come & Go… The Owner Wasn’t From My Area So She Didn’t Know That Many People. It Seemed Like Every Venue We Went To I Either Knew The Owner Already From High School Or College, I Knew The Other Guest Models From Other Companies; and/or Promoters. I Didn’t Realize That Over The Almost 2 Year Time, My Creativity, My Out-Of-The-Box Universe Given Mind, That People Actually Thought… Her Company Was Mine.. I Just Happened To Be A Real Ass Bitch That Never Crossed Anyone… Never Been Ran Through.. And My Face Good In Any Hood.. The People Trust My Word.. Because I’m Not With The Shits.. Nor The Drama..

“My Grace… My Grace Is My Most Powerful Weapon… Armed With My Creativity… I’m a Beast”– @MochakittzSays

Over Time The Original Girls That Were The “OG’s” Of The Promotional Modeling Group Fell Off. I Then, With One Other; Became An Triple O.G.. I Couldn’t Understand Why Because They (And The Other 1 Triple O.G Left ) ALWAYS Had Photoshoots Lined Up And A Fashion Show Waiting. Me On The Other Hand, I Was Always Looked Over.. I Could Attend But I Couldn’t Walk. I Would Say I’ve Done A Total Of 3 Fashion Shows, 2 Photoshoots, And One Magazine Cover That Was Mysteriously Switched To Another Model Last Minute… How When The Photographer Specifically Picked Me Out Of All The Models To Do A Solo Shoot Using Props… I Later Learned From A Close Inside Source With The Magazine; The Request For The Switch-e-Roo Was By My Management Company’s Request. Here’s The Original Cover:

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😑😑 It’s Not Like We Got PAID FOR ANYTHING We Did.. Smh Not Knowing This At The Time, I Continued Paying Respect To The Owner…. While Still Creating My Own Personal Comp Cards & Fliers…. Showcasing My Skills Other Than Modeling… Like I Was Initially Brought On To Do.

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👹👺The Last Straw For Me Was When I Was Finally Included In A Booking By A FAILED Local Fashion Boutique..That I Will Not Give Any Clout To And Shall Remain Nameless.. (I Will Never @ Mention Or Directly Speak A Person’s Name Because I Could Give 2 F&Cks About Your Clout Meter. That’s For Your Friends..And Social Media.. But When You See That Post.. If You Think You Need That Energy.. If It’s For You.. Accept It..🌠 And Watch The Glow Up.. 🌜🌜🌜🌜🌜Chyy.. Anywho..) Had Me Take My Good, Precious Ass Time Out To Practice Walking.. Which I SLAYED✍.. Get Sized For An Outfit.. Which Made Everything POP! Just To Allow The Owner Of My Management Group To Give My Outfit Away To A New, Skinnier, Model That Had Literally Just Joined The Prior Week… With HER HAIR NEWLY STRAIGHTENED… I Had Just Done My “Big-Chop” And Decided To Wear My Afro For The Walk… Embracing My New Journey.. The Boutique Owner LOVED IT… Yeah..Yeah.. Yeah.. Until It Was Time To Walk.. When I Tell You I WAS VIVID! One Of The 2 Triple O.G Models And MY Outfit Was Given To The New Chick Just Because She Knew “Famous People… Had A Long Weave, And Less Urban Looking”.. I Just Couldn’t Believe It…

I Had A Flashback To The Last Fashion Show We Were Booked For (Fashion Show 2 of 3). How I Stood Out Not Only Because I’m This Beautiful Tall, Curvy Shaped, Slim-Thick Woman.. But Because The Rest Of The Models Looked Like Vogue Models And I Looked More Rogue.. LMAO I Thought It Was Just Something That You Have To Accept In The Fashion World.. Your Not Going To Like The Outfit Every-time. Your Not Going To Like The Make-up.. But SELL IT! To Allow The Models To Talk About Me Secretly.. My Make-Up For The Show.. To Entertain The Body Shaming.. When She Herself Has Admitted To Me On A Personal Level That She Battled With Weight, Perception Of Beauty In Society, ETC., Was The Time I Literally Debated Beating A Bitches Ass Just For Principle.

The Betrayal Is Enough I Grab Your Baby Oil Frfr.. I’m Just Keepin’ It Real. She Vowed To Make It Up To Me The Next Fashion Show.. Which I Provided Promotions To All The People I Knew In The Right Places.. They Showed.. It Was Really Packed.. Then To Turn Around And Show Me Her Real Colors… Intentions… Here’s Where I Say I’m Loyal To A Fault. But You Live & You Learn.

Continuing To Press On Through The Show, I Took It Upon Myself To Walk Out In MY OWN MF OUTFIT! Yes I DID HUNNNNAYYYY…… I Knew The Person Hosting And I Let Them Know What Happened And HE ANNOUNCED ME… USING INSPIRE MY BAWSET On The Fashion…. I Took Out My Lace Tu-Tu Dress, My (Then) Exclusive Black Sparkle Pumps (That I Snatched Back Off The Owners Feet) And Beat My Chest! Admittedly, I Was Bursting With Adrenaline And I Wobbled In My Pumps Walking Down The Auditorium Carpet.. Proud That I Had Continued On And Didn’t Go Home.. And Inspired To Break Off On My Own.. I Wasn’t Stealing Her Swag Or Anything.. She Looked TO ME For Inspiration… You Could Never Look At My Page And Say… She Snatched That From.. So & SO… It’s Always A Battle For My Slay.. Lmao

I’m Still Cool With The Person That Hosted & Announced “MOCHA APPLEBUM” In The Fashion Show To This Day. He Has Always Seen A Drive In Me That Others Miss. He Now, Has His Own Local Music Awards Show That Airs On The Local Television Station Yearly!

The Stunt & Flex Of Individual Strength On My Part Obviously Was Noted… Shortly, After That A String Of Ridiculous And Drastic Changes Occurred. It Would Be Mass Model Calls, Unreasonable Last Minute Mandatory Meetings.. If You Couldn’t Make It, You Were Cut.. You Know, How Your Job Acts When They Want To Clean House.. I Feel Like It Was More Aimed To Get ME Off The Team.. Most Of The Chicks Were Dropping Off And I Didnt Read Social Clues Well By Realizing She Was Distancing Herself… Entertaining The Newbies Without A Clue.. Completing Her Plan Of “Starting Over”? Of Course You Would Want To Start Over Now That I’ve Gotten You Notifiable In The Charlotte Nightlife & Fashion Market. It Was More Like… ‘Thanks For All You’ve Done.. But Buh BYE Bitch.. Your Coming Up With Things My Owner Ass Doesn’t Even Consider… Thanks For Notoriety Sucka!”

As You Know, I Have A Child.. I’m In School… Part-Time Job… SO my Ass Got Cut…. It Did Really Hurt When It Happened. You Consider A Person Your Friend And They Are Just Close To You For The Wrong Reasons. I Mean I’ve Been To This Women’s House, I’ve Met Her Family, I’ve Wiped Her Tears During Girl Talk.. And She Has Wiped Mine.. All That For A Little Clout? Since, I Hear She’s Doing A Little Bit Of Struggle Photograpghy And Her Promotional Company Hasn’t Been Popping Since I Left The Scene.. But Let Me Eat My Humble Pie.. **Tisk Tisk**

So Yes, I Did Take A Break.. And When You See Those Pictures Of Me From Back In The Day They Document A Time In My Life Where I Learned A Little Bit More About Myself. How Beautiful I Really Was… Bald And Natural… 😂 How My Heart & Mind Are Boastfully Better Than The Average Person’s.. My Moral/Values Scale Really Does Control How I Interact With People. How I Want To Be A Beacon Of Light… (I Think Copy-Cat Shit Irritates Me The Most.. I’m Learning That Imitation Is The Biggest Form Of Flattery.. Being Empathic Just Makes Looking At Stuff Different Because I Can See Intentions.. So If You Did It With Me In Mind (To Hate) We (Me & My Ancestors, And My True Friends) Are Always Flattered…)Next On G-Check With Mocha Kittz… Why I Decided To Return… And How You Can Continue Growing #InspireNation!

Thank You So Much For All The Lovin’ & Support #SupportYourLocalGirlGang💫💫Find A Star In My Cosmos And Search Through My Latest Posts By Clicking Here! Thanks Again For Stopping By In My Galaxy! Please Contact Me If You Are Interested In Brand Ambassador Services, Features & Collabs On Youtube, Clearance To Use My Videos (Kudos Or Roast), And Much More By Contacting Me Through My Business Email: RantingsOfMocha@Gmail.com Book Me Today For Venue Appearances, Motivational Speaking Conventions, And Anything Arts Under The Sun… Or Moon 🌛🌜

@MochaKittzSays/@BROWNBONEDBAWSET

*~Xoxo~*

Author: Mocha Kittz, Rantings Of Mocha

2 Truths & A Lie: *I enjoy walking on the sides of my feet.* *I love to yell out the window to people walking by. And watch them look for me.* *I have a pet Lizard*

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